melody

I am still waiting for the day,,,,,for the day of new land ,,,,

Day and night I keep on shading the lamp
before closing the eyes I took a leap of faith
I am in this place, a place where I was molded
I am in this place, a place of my first memory
I am in this place, a place of black and gray

I don't want to be prison here...I've been wishing..praying.to be somewhere out..but there's no way to escape..My heart is crushed..I go deeper on the wells...trying the best luck but still i wait for no tomorrow...


Man and woman destined to be together....bells and rings celebrates happiness.....moon and starts shines at night......Man and woman loved each other....


***lady of symphony

Why Do I not Love?
Why do I not love? he asked me
Why do I not love? I asked me
love is cruel, yet is the sweetest pain
love is fragile yet it is the most unbreakable.
Now, why do I not love?
Do I not love because I hate?
Do I not love because I'm afraid?
or Do I not love because I know you won't love me back.


***Lady of symphony in seasons of love

Will I wait in vain or stand coldly in the pouring rain
Will you be on my side to give me warm
Will the whisper of winter fade away
or will the sun bursts and turn our love into dusts
I don't know..with uncertainties I cannot give love
call me weak and hate me to death but I can't give a love
for I have not known love for I never met love
I don't know when will the spring of love come or will it ever greet me again
Under this maple tree , I will be like the alluring leaves waiting for the spring
And when it comes, just like the leaves I will gracefully fall and dance in the wind

Hymn for HIM

You were the stranger I never bothered to know

 The wall I would just pass by

The paper that give me no impression

The shadow that never caught my eye

The star I never gazed up on night

But destiny has throned the dice and we landed on the same field

Then You were seating next to me. 

At the end, at the back row of  the arena, we were there.

And each of our black moon has locked on its path.

A smile on your grimace and a kindle in my own trace.

Now you speak up and I've heard your voice,

Addictive as wine, the only music I could define

We were there at the back row, at the end of the plaza.

And every day we got closer with each other.

We opened our diaries and we spoke the letters

And we didn't mind the Picasso.

We were there , at the back row at the end of the sweet garden

I felt your lavish skin and now we were never in a distance

And now we see each others world

We were there at the back row at the end of Adam's paradise.

We prayed that the music won't stop, 

But we could never control the symphony

The curtains have closed and the orchestra has died

We were there at the back row at the end of the Great Opera House

Two hearts have become one in the center of circles

The Top and the Ball have danced for the night

We were there at the back row at the end of the city of Love

But now they were just  sweet memories written at the end, at the back row of the buried History 

The Elizabeth had once asked 

will thou dae everything?

Will thee be undone for Love?

Will thou stop the rolls and halt the knights?

What can thee dae for LOVE?

Another dice was thrown

But we were no longer there

      We are no longer at the back row at the end of the castle

And just like any other tragic story

We ended up like Romeo and Juliet

For I chose to let go

For I can't do anything For Love

For I am not Islde

Forgive me for leaving you at the back row at the end of  the temple

Fare thee well

*INceptION** (22)

You're waiting for a train, a train that will take you far away. You know where you hope this train will take you, but you can't be sure. But it doesn't matter - because we'll be together.

Its been a long time since I've posted on this blog......(this post is originally written on the 2nd week of august)..I am becoming too lazy now....I'm glad that finally I've come into form of relaxation and just calmly express my thoughts. Junior College is stressing me out.I need to feed my mind with some good movies.

I guess for the month of July-August "Inception" was the talk of the town.This blog of mine has emphasized dreams , the difference of reality and fantasy ,on how our minds creates our own utopia and how we wished to escape the pain of reality. Finally a movie has brought that concept into the new level. Kudos to the writer and creative management, the whole movie was one of a kind. I've enjoyed every second of it.

Dom Cobb is a skilled thief, the absolute best in the dangerous art of extraction, stealing valuable secrets from deep within the subconscious during the dream state, when the mind is at its most vulnerable. Cobb's rare ability has made him a coveted player in this treacherous new world of corporate espionage, but it has also made him an international fugitive and cost him everything he has ever loved. Now Cobb is being offered a chance at redemption. One last job could give him his life back but only if he can accomplish the impossible-inception. Instead of the perfect heist, Cobb and his team of specialists have to pull off the reverse: their task is not to steal an idea but to plant one. If they succeed, it could be the perfect crime. But no amount of careful planning or expertise can prepare the team for the dangerous enemy that seems to predict their every move. An enemy that only Cobb could have seen coming. Written by Warner Bros. Pictures

Inception made an impossible impetus into reality. We all dream and we question its existence and meaning. According to Adler dreams are an important tool to mastering control over your waking lives,while Freud analyzed dreams in order to understand aspects of personality as they relate to pathology,Hall believed dreams are the best way to discovering personal thoughts and to explain your behavior,according to Jung, dreams are a way of communicating and acquainting yourself with the unconscious and Perls believed that dreams contain the rejected, disowned parts of the Self.

These theories of dreams were actually manifested in the movie but the movie itself created its own theory. The theory that a person can enter into one's dream and manipulate or take away its thoughts on its subconscious.

A person can enter in some one else dream.....is that possible? in the movie, absolutely, and perhaps we may not know this could lead to some technology revolution in which we could enter other's dreams.
Not only that, they could dream within a dream and they have done that in 4 layers.

here are some quotes from the movies

Cobb: Our dreams, they feel real while we're in them right? Its only when we wake up then we realize that something was actually strange!
When we are dreaming, we're not aware that we are in a dreamland instead we thought of it as the existing state and when we wake up sometimes those vivid images remain nd sometimes the obscure events break away. And often times we thought of what maybe the interpretation of our dreams.]
This was the technique of Cobb's team to implant a concept in the dream to appear it as it is the truth.


Ariadne: Why is it so important to dream?
Cobb: Because, in my dreams we are together

I think this line also applies to us, wen wanted to dream because in that dream , with our unconscious thoughts we fulfill our desires . Unconsciously, we created a world ( I believe most taken from our memories and unconscious mind) where we could draw happiness and erase bitterness. For Cobb, this was his main struggle he can't let go of his dream because in his only dream he could still see and feel the presence of his dead wife. And I guess this is the critical point, when we no longer face reality and instead cling into that dream that may lead to us into false perceptions.

Cobb: The moment's passed. Whatever I do I can't change this moment. I'm about to call out to them. They run away. If I'm ever going to see their faces I've gotta get back home. The real world.

Cobb has missed the growth of his children he had not experienced a real life.everything was all inception..everything was just a shade of reality and a drop of pain

Cobb: Look at you. You're just a shade, a shade of my real wife. How could I capture all your beauty, your complexity, your perfection, your imperfection, in a dream? Yes, you're the best that I can do. But, I'm sorry, you're just not good enough.
 those bittersweet memories just keep coming on, because of his Guilt he couldn't take off the grip. Mal was often the antagonist in his dream, Mal sabotages their plan but actually it was Cobb who ruined the architecture of the dream, it was his own memories that put the knots ..He couldn't remove the tangle .

Mal: We'd be together forever. You promised me.
Cobb: I know. But we can't. And I'm sorry.
Mal: You remember when you asked me to marry you? You said you dreamt that we'd grow old together.
Cobb: And we did... I miss you more than I can bear... but we had our time together. And now I have to let go... 

 As I hear these lines.. tears fell down.I could feel the love of Cobb to his wife ..Leonardo is such a prefect actor for this role... They had travel in their own world , together they walked in their journeys and together they were happy filled with love. Not everyday is a dream, not everyday is sleeping into imagination but rather everyday must be a reality. And with that single pinch of pain, they had forgotten to wake up, they had forgotten reality , they had abandoned the life they have and the children they adore. In the dream world, sand castles and pink houses they can control but it end up they no longer take the wheel of their future.
In the waking or dreaming life they both shared the love but unfortunately for Mal, she can longer bear the pain of confusion. Cobb was able to stay away from the limbo state. It was almost a decade , a decade of suffering a decade of memories that caused tragedy. Mal chose to ended her life, she didn't figure it out she was prisoned in the memories of her dreams . Cobb did his best to wake up Mal and make her realize that they are now in reality and not in the dream. Cobb carried the guilt for it was he who gave Mal the idea of fantasy, the idea of creating their own paths. It was tragic, Cobb couldn't do anything with his idea he killed his wife.It took a long time for him to soon realize that she had to let go of the kite . He kept on thinking and governing his emotions on Mal , he kept on dreaming to fade away the pain and to feel again the sweet love of his life but with his thoughts it made him worst. he didn't had the chance to see his children, didn't have the chance to enjoy it as it supposed to be...
Most of the time our demotions triggers our dreams and sometimes our dreams triggers our emotions. I used to dream before a very sad scene of my life, it kept on recurring , all I wanted is to forget it but why does it keep on running ?? Sooner after I've realized that the scene left me with a disturbing emotion but thanks to my dream , slowly it healed my self. But for Cobb's case the more he sees his wife the more he jumps into it and the more he fails to see the truth.

Leap of faith,” “Old man full of regret, waiting to die alone,” 

And what happens to Saito??? he was also trapped in the limbo state..he's greedy dreams made him an old man in an unrealistic world ....In a lifetime nightmare in which it is most difficult to escape....It begun all in Saito, with his command for inception. for his desire to be on the top and that self dream of his has ended his real triumph.

You're waiting for a train, a train that will take you far away. You know where you hope this train will take you, but you can't be sure. But it doesn't matter - because we'll be together. 

This is the riddle shared by Cobb and his wife...This the riddle (I'm not sure) that Cobb spoke to let his wife be in the kick and finally see reality.....The hit of the train will take them far away .far away from the world they've created.......The world that once was their paradise become the wrecker of their happy life...

What truly made me bewildered ins the ending of the movie....It kept us all thinking.what the heck was the conclusion.was he still in the limbo state or has he already awaken from the dream......He had seen his children but the top is continually spinning....well the story lies in our hands......I hope it has a sequel and explains every puzzle in it.....Some says it was all Cobb's limbo state....everything was creatively designed in Cobb's ind and the characters were all projections...But whatever is the truth in it.let's just wait perhaps they could have another story in the sequel....
**************************************************************************

There were some dreams that made you afraid to sleep. some dreams that made you feel tremble that even at the daylight it haunted you and affected you...What's within the dreams, why do we have emotions on it and why does some dreams doesn't stop it keeps on existing even at the waking life...There were some dreams that made you think, that mad you pray and eat. There were some dreams that you wished to be filtered, wished to be not remembered but somehow it raises your blood pressure.......some dreams we were thankful for it was only a dream........and some dreams that we die for that we don't want to escape and shape it with our own finger tips....Why does dream exists??? why does God allows dreaming??? I can't imagine my self without a dream,.,,,,To dream is like my portal to the extreme world....Whatever our dreams maybe it is important that in our waking life we fulfill our responsibilities and make sure we don't across imagery....
Dream on and be Awake!

Sunday Morning

This Sunday was not my typical Sunday......I have nonentity to be concerned or to boggle of, I've ate my breakfast and I woke up early...Oh sweet Sunday, a serene and bouncy daylight.


To take pleasure in the chirps of the birds and the sways of the flowers I've grab the newspaper. I don't know why I am so in the doldrums this week to read books and articles; perhaps this was an end product of almost a whole week facing the volumes for the midterm examinations.

In the Allure section of The Philippine Star, an article title made me bring to a halt for a while...

"The night Go danced the 'Moon walk' in the middle of the rain"
It seems to be a title of a novel or a spiritual book. It was written by Bum Tenorio Jr. I am actually not a reader of the allure sections, mostly I only gazed in the images but this time the title made a significant sound in my mind. As I browsed through the article it put a smile on my face and an uplifting feeling of my soul.

"I love it when it rains at night"....

I agree with the writer, rain is the most beautiful music, its thunder and flashing lights is like a symphony. Rain calms me down, it makes me think and look back. I remember the days when I was a child running and dancing in the rain not thinking that I could get a flu. When it rains it's like celebrating it is like your own momentum.


The author then narrated what happened to him one rainy evening a text message he received form a priest asking if f he is still interested to become one. He replied "no more, I don't think I have the calling for it" "Can you just imagine the seminary with me there? Gosh, I'll teach Jesus to dance and laugh non-stop at the seminary! And I'm sure god will love me for that"


The author and I have some little commonalities, me and my sister before used to dream to become a nun but later on found out it wasn't our calling. It made me think, how does God dance?? Or does He dance at all?? What life does God has???

The author imagined himself and God singing together Pyramid...And laughing with each other and I too pondered this in my mind... What if God sings?? What would be sound of His Melody?? Would he be out of tuned or has a powerful voice like Josh Groban??

The author has also mentioned that no one among his Religious teachers told him that God has ever laughed. He even questioned if God has ever tried to laugh-tear and wondered how do we talk to God? Can be casual?

Me too, I never heard on the religious teachings saying God is laughing, does God also laughs in our jokes?? Does he make Faces??What is the language of God??

I'm sure He speaks from His heart, His language is Love. I talk to God almost all of the time, even though there is no visible response I could still feel and hear what He wanted to say....To know that there is God is like knowing that there is air that keeps us alive.

The author had also asked if God also stresses out and imagined God and his self dancing; imagine God doing the "Moon Walk". Then with that God is very cool. The author stretches out that if God has created trees whose branches sway to the hymns of the mind then for sure, God knows how to dance. It is wonderful to imagine God dancing because with it I could think of Happiness, happiness of everyone.

God is truly a great artist a great scientist a genius a brilliant architect, imagined how he designed our body ,our world and how He loved a sinner like me.

True , this is very true......and when the time when I will see God I m very sure that the first thing that I would do is cry and ask for forgiveness...I know I have done a lot of things that broke His heart and I would cry for I know I am not worthy to be His child but there still days left and I will use this day to give back His love and so if ever the day will come that I will Meet Him then at least He would be happy that He created me.

"I am certain I will not ask Him what makes Him cry. I already know the answer. I made him cry many times. Yet still, He loves me just the same"

Same as the writer I am not the normal religious woman, in fact I don't attend masses every Sunday, I don't follow the normal rituals of the Catholics but I believe in Him and I know in my own way I could show How Thankful I am that He is my Father.

I will always have this Sunday morning, a morning with God.......

Affliction

a poem written for my literature class..........

Affliction

The shadow of the night caves in down on me.

My eyes beguiled by the thousand words of free

My heart is lock, wedging out the vivid memories

The first time I caught his semblance

My eyes were mystified, he was my all stance

He was the moonlight in the cloudy sky

The sunlight in the darkest time

He had sung the songs of stars

He had travelled the world of sands

He had searched for the sweetest lime

He had come across of every sublime

But he had offered me his precious love.

And here I am, frantic as the frozen glass

Crippled in the layers of contrast

And here I am standing in the Pisa

Puzzled as the painting of Monalisa

I have nothing to give

I refused to dance in his rain

For I have no time to stand in vain

I had abandoned Love and closed the gates

I had broke his heart

And stole his sparks

Winter and Fall has passed away

But the aches still remain

I saw him once again

I followed him in sight

to where I wished he'd stop.

But tears suddenly climb down

His hands collided with the hands of another

My almost numb skin, dripping and shriveled

Why does it hurt? Why this terrifying sound of beats?

And now as we crossed the paths

He walked past me just like the wind

Cupid, why are you such a fool?

Why struck the arrow in the wrong time?

This bitter sweet love has caused pain

Love, love, love! Why is something so wonderful so despised?

All I have are traces of sadness, and cruel is the day,

Now the memories of him and me locked in ray

Become a fleeting castle in the sky of gray

ALICE

ALICE

Sitting on a fringed ledge in the morning, contemplating on the beauteous and simple stanzas of nature.

The beacon glorifies the scorching caress of the grandiose sun, the trees glared and whistled on the Herculean billows

An hour glass is enduring in the diamond of sands, the petals delighted in the slow dance of the tangles

As I languish in mellow havoc with time and belie one’s self from nuisance, a little girl bustled beforehand with a genial silhouette appeared in translucence

She cradled my hand and brought me to her wonderland and a scent of happiness was all around

She was in the mainstream of a rampage crowd but they were spell bound by her magic soughed.

She vented with the hatter and enlivened his heart, she is the frisky harlequin of every man in roughed

Alone she ambled like a thief in the night to the vicinity of a mystical door, she insinuates in defiance for a savior

And now we were trap in the ungraceful maze, and underneath is a fiery blaze. In all awe I saw an alcazar of enthralling ace cards, she named it as her graveyard.

She brought tea to the three enchanting rabbits trifled underneath the palm trees, She‘s generous even to the bandits travelling around the sullen fields

I fathomed the king and queen caper the shafts on bland and unflattering wall, this fine-grained damsel is like a pawn, noble and a faithful servant of them all.

When everything falls down she rises up again, forms another cloud filled with giddy moisture patiently waiting for her emancipation.

The she heard the blustering sound of the ringing bell, she spurred in the moment walking above the perilous braiding for the open door, but everything turned pale

She cried for she can no longer find way to return to her wonderland. .Oh sweet child, now singing the lonely tunes of the underground.

She search for a family portrait but it was not found, she quench to hear a lullaby but there was no sound

She won’t let go of the kite…She was all in fright, Once was a fragile face now a grotesque imprint of pain.

The golden beam now escapes her grimace and all I could gaze is a broken trace

Oh poor Alice of wonderland……..

I carried her with my arms and lay her in the sands…The hourglass vanished in quick episode…walloping waves has captured her.

…Oh they had taken Alice, prison in the icy colds of Davy Jones’ Locker.

I looked below the mirrored and reflecting façade, it showed me nothing but a vague reflection of my own countenance

This is a metamorphical poem about myself...............hahahhahahaa..............

Healing Hearts

Gloomy skies are up above…..little rain drops pass by…..tears is climbing down …

Silent strings soothes down while the cold air sings and petals of roses lay down….

Today was the last day of glimpse to her beloved mother....There was this boy who was like the clown of the class; he is indeed smart, always positive and cheerful. Sad news broke his heart last year; his mother is diagnosed with cancer. We we're not close friends but everyone seem to like him because of his blissful spirit. Today who could’ve thought the boy who has the biggest smiles is now crying like a child losing his kite......

We never thought he was in a painful process, no marks of worries or pain on his fragile face but only a light ray of happiness.....

I could emotionally relate to whatever he is going though, It was also summer when my grandma was hospitalized.....and also in month of June my grandma passed away....It was like 4 years ago, but the pain didn't totally vanished, in my dream it kept on recurring the times that she was by my side, the times when I hugged her tight and the times she says those nice words...

To me she was like a second mother, she made me feel I belong to the family; she kept on saying that I will be a doctor and will be a very beautiful woman... She never forgets my birthday, she praises me when I do good things and even give me rewards. These things are little things of everything to me.........These things are simple things that my own parents never let me experienced. and that's why I treasured so much the times that I have spent with her........I was like also in 2 months at the hospital...Together with my cousin , I was her caretaker...And witnessing her suffering just tormented my heart away...hoping that I could take away all the pain. Even trading places with her was my wish just to end the anguish....

And maybe this was also the situation for him....Losing a mother is like losing one organ of your body....I understand how painful it is but I know I will never know how painful it is for him....

Isn't it too early?? Isn’t it unfair?/.....Before I questioned why those good people suffer so much, why do they have to suffer before they die??Can’t they have tranquility before they depart?........But now I am thankful for that opportunity...seeing my grandma suffering allowed me and my relatives to show to her how much we care and love her....allowed us to feel human and experience life,, allowed us to realize the significance of time......with those moments it taught me a lifetime learning...It gave me hope and loved life....

I know it won't be easy. It takes days, weeks, months, and many years to be OK and fully accept what had happened.....It will never be the same again....

All the good things they have done will always be remembered, the scar will always be a mark of how special they are and how they've changed our lives....

When someone is in grief, a friend cams by and gave a big hug...and I think that is the most wonderful part, knowing that you are not alone and there are people who cares so much about you...

I want to share this song by Josh Groban......It left me with tears.......

Who can say for certain

Maybe you’re still here

I feel you all around me

Your memories so clear

Deep in the stillness

I can hear you speak

You’re still an inspiration

Can it be (? )

That you are mine

Forever love

And you are watching over me from up above

Fly me up to where you are

Beyond the distant star

I wish upon tonight

To see you smile

If only for awhile to know you’re there

A breath away’s not far

To where you are

Are you gently sleeping

Here inside my dream

And isn’t faith believing

All power can’t be seen

As my heart holds you

Just one beat away

I cherish all you gave me everyday

’cause you are mine

Forever love

Watching me from up above

And I believe

That angels breathe

And that love will live on and never leave

Fly me up

To where you are

Beyond the distant star

I wish upon tonight

To see you smile

If only for awhile

To know you’re there

A breath away’s not far

To where you are

I know you’re there

A breath away’s not far

To where you are

We may not see them physically but we knew they are embracing God's hands and we knew they are still watching us...To where they are now; we will always love and remember them...

May all hearts be healed and all souls be in peace.......

God bless!

Airplanes of May

It's been like a month since I've posted on my blog.This one was actually written in days of May...I still want you to share my thoughts  on these.

These past few days, I was overwhelmed by unfortunate events........

Yes, I was coated with hatred and misery ....asking life , why shouldn't it be me??

There are things that just flowed and swallowed us, I've accepted it and it made my bones stronger.......There are things that are very gracious, very tantalizing and it didn't approached you, it turned you back.....and asked why ??

I'm going to share to you this song.,....it really inspired me and made me felt better.....

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now, a wish right now, a wish right now
Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars
I could really use a wish right now, a wish right now, a wish right now

*Until now I've always waited for shooting stars and still hoped that there will be a little spark of miracle.

We all have wishes and desires, and we badly seek for it....

We even come up with a genie in a bottle that will give us three wishes......

We adore how it remains in our subtle chimera and

 we enjoy how we kept on waiting for the day of its reality.

I could use a dream or a genie or a wish

To go back to a place much simpler than this

Cause after all the partying and smashing and crashing

And all the glitz and glam and the fashion

And all the pandemonium and all the madness

There comes a time when you fade to the blackness

And when you're staring at the phone in your lap

And you hoping but them people never call you back

But that's just how the story unfolds

You get another hand soon after you fold

And when your plans unravel in the sand

What would you wish for if you had one chance?

So airplane airplane sorry I'm late

I'm on my way so don't close that gate

If I don't make that then I'll switch my flight and

I'll be right back at it by the end of the night

* what is it like when you are already on the cloud 9 of your dreams.? what is it like when you have a ll the fame and fortune....I know it won't feel good at all....We need to pay the prize...I do aim high but at the same time I keep on thinking and reminding myself that fame, fortune, those deceiving lights,sweet words,and traitor claps they can pull you down and eventually leave you on despair. The lyrics of the song is very true, could we wish for more ? when curtains fall and you see your shadow weeping in the center stage, what would you wish for? Would you wish for time to spin back? or would hope that these life you've inced wished for would just vanish like a candle being blown?

Yeah somebody take me back to the days

Before this was a job before I got paid

Before it ever mattered what I had in my bank

Yeah back when I was trying to get a tip at Subway

And back when I was rapping for the hell of it

But nowadays we rapping to stay relevant

I'm guessing that if we can make some wishes outta airplanes

Then maybe oh maybe I'd go back to the days

Before the politics that we call the rap game

And back when ain't nobody listened to my mix tape

And back before I tried to cover up my slang

But this is for Decatur what's up Bobby Ray

So can I get a wish to end the politics

And get back to the music that started this shit

So here I stand and then again I say

I'm hoping we can make some wishes outta airplanes

*I know there will come a moment in which we to make our choice. But whatever choices we make, we should not regret on it but instead face whatever are the consequences. Choices may make you blue, but with a Strong Faith and blissful spirit this once wrong choice could end up right. We may be stuck in an awful maze but we shouldn't allow ourselves to be caught up...instead we need to find the way, bewildering it may be, but we need to try to find that exit and could finally get a new start.

There is no rewind button, pause nor fast forward......all we can do is face it and get it fixed.

This was once my thought.....

I wanna run.but where??? I wanna crawl and hide but where's the haven?I've been asking myself why I don't get happiness? what does really make me happy?? just before , just in a seconds ago I was so blissful and sunny and suddenly when the doors shutdown I become gloomy and dark feather

Sometimes I want to be numb.I want to feel nothing....But this is reality.It is painful and no matter how hard i try drifting my mind to my own utopia....there is always a pinch of reality.....and I can't escape it.....

I'm facing it but I'm trembling on it....I admit I am weak and only God can carry all the pain inside me.......

I've been childish.....selfish..........I've been counting the blessings I have......But actually what matters to me is the respect that people will give to me.Sometimes it is heart wrenching to make fool of yourself just to put a smile on a frowning face. . And I hate myself for being unfair to me.......For being coward and just accepting those things.but what can I do???? that's all I can do....

Do we have the right to question????? when we knew that everything will be settled in the right time.

I've been patiently waiting and sometimes I got tired of it.....but should I give up on dreaming??? I don't know...We can't get what we always want......

I know for sure God sets the right time for us......

Let the Jeepney:Take you there

Election heat has finally turned down.The yellow flag is now standing and waving......This day I was exhausted, I  accompany again my cousin to my university,,,,,it was really stressful when you are trying to help her but she's not helping herself....My cousin's major problem is that she doesn't know how to commute , she's even afraid to be inside a cab...........

Here in the Philippines we used Jeep as a means of transportation. jeepney is termed as the king of street because of its heavy weight, height and its major causes of traffic.......There are about 18 passengers in one jeepney...it is chromatic and creatively accessorized and it you will only need Php 7 for a trip.

There's a deck of cards of entrancing and morbid episodes that will be coded inside the jeep. In a flash, a quick fox could be gripping your phone, wallet or life. In a day there's a bulk of snatching cases.In late nights these kings are prone to accidents, they could be stuck in a massive hole or collide with a giant or gnome.

Inside the  Jeepneys is like inside a preheated oven and like a barrel of mixed peppers, what I mean is there are mixed odors and very expose to pollution.You could not even experience tranquility because there are some leery poker faces. And you wouldn't even like sitting like a hatter so tight on a hot flush seat and raising your arm trying to grab some silver rod..Sometimes there is a enie-minnie squabble between the conductor/driver and the passengers. We ,passengers couldn't understand why they keep on getting passengers when there is no enough seat.

That's why sometimes people would prefer to ride on a cab , even though it is expensive at least it is much more comfortable cool and your solo on the chesterfield.But I have bad notes on riding a cab,supremely when the sun has sets.I am more petrified quietly sitting in a cab than riding in a jeepney.....in the cab the driver could make fun of you, making threats and making you uneasy,,,,,sometimes they would trick you, especially if you look so innocent and doesn't know the directions they could just turn you around and let you pay much...Sometimes you left some valuable things and not all drivers are honest and caring enough to report it and give it back to you...There are also been cases where in drivers hold up their passengers and abandon them in an unknown area....

But i think most of us would love to be on our own car........everybody ,I think, has their dream car......I was once dreaming for a jaguar,hummer,Cadillac,Lexus and Volvo.....but I think I can have it in nearly next 10 years.Inside us we want our own luxury, our own precious modern Pegasus...Isn't it lovely to be on the chaise lounge,hands tight on wheels and with an overflowing music while on your Way to paradise ? or isn't it like an awakening spirit when your inside your haven, where you can hide and turn around any time when you are  on your ticket to dark jungle?

It is like You are carrying your own statement on the streets, it is just like the way we make statements in fashion.Some people would have an eye, with expressions of admiration some people would have a stare wishing for a glitch and some people would stop trying to break that foggy crap.

To have a car is like having a child , we are responsible for it, we need to feed it, educate it, fix it and love it.We can go wherever we want to go, because the car brings you everywhere.

But there are a lot of things that people would really missed in riding the taxi and their luxury car.Thes are the things that only happens or mostly happens in the Jeeps.

There are so many amazing things that happens in a jeepney. In a jeepney, there's an opportunity to help, when an elderly one comes in you could assist them, or move on the left side and let them take the comfortable seat. There could be guardian who are bringing the kids, again you could assist them.

Inside a jeepney could be a proclamation or a debate. Drivers and passengers could exchanged opinions , exchange bitter words and claims. And again the other passengers could assist any one of them, they could back fire or be a mediator. Inside the jeepney there's a colorful conversations and there's free gossip.....passengers would talk aloud that you would find yourself smiling about their chants. You could bumped to your friends or acquaintances and there you go exchange of words.You could laugh out loud and even sober, there's plenty of people who would be there for you.Inside a jeep there's reflection.Passengers sit opposite to each other, and in that you could clearly see their expressions, and you would have that empathy. you will knew who had the bad day and who's in a bliss. Inside a jeep there could be friendships built, there will be familiar faces and sometimes you would puzzle if that familiar face would be sooner be part of your ride.There will be exchange of glances and smiles. There are memories buried inside it.And though there's a lot of negative words you could throw in a  jeepney, it is still the king of streets, it blows your ride.

Life is just like the Cab,Luxury car and the Jeepney. They have the common ground, taking us to our destination.Life is a destination.There are too many crossroads, sometimes we got confused.The red light is on, we have to stop. No matter how desperate we are to move forward, we have to stop, and think again.In our lives we needed break, in every hassle ,in every back aching loads and bullets of words, we always needed to pause. Then there's the yellow light we have to slow down, we humans can't really get enough. Why be impatient? There's time, make most of it, sometimes when we fast forward we missed moments  and we knew there's no rewind, that's why there is a slow motion. Take it easy and everything will run smoothly. Now we go for green, it's time go, go ahead of your life keep going until we reach our final destination.

2010 "YEAR of CHANGE"

The Ninoy Aquino phenomenon II: A study in peaceful change

”The great “legitimizer” of government is the ballot not the bullet”Ninoy Aqunio

As I scrolled down my homepage on Face book political shibboleth are on their profile pics and some have clamored political wisdom on their status messages. As I switched local channels political ads are on race. As I move out in a box of shelter, all in my eyes are posters and tarps  on the weak barricades. And when I meandered on the avenue, my ears are in pain of those loud political rattles on a monstrous vehicle. I am flooded with campaign and forum invitations.

Yes Philippines is now on its zenith of politics. Election is going to happen in the next five days . It seems people now are more aggressive and active .They are like those malignant ninjas in the saddle for a ravage. I think most especially the youth were influenced by ABS-CBN's ako ang simula agenda. And Filipinos seems to be enervated and  had enough of playing as meek of the administration of PGMA.

Change is it really going to happen? my answer yes and in a major way. Whoever sits on that couch there is certainly change going to happen, the question is..is it for worst or better?

I honestly don't like the system of my country , especially on rules of campaigning.there are too many candidates , and yes comelec has these list of rules but when they are violated they didn't do anything.....and I do hate the way the politicians endorsed themes selves. Could they stop bragging what they have done? or they assumed that they have done..and could they stop making black notes on their opponents....

to be a good leader is to fight clean... Now for those candidates who had made black propaganda clearly for me they aren't good leaders. they are so desperate that they need to stain other person's name just to have a good appeal.

Politicians often use poverty and the poor people. but honestly, poor community doesn't even  care about these politicians, they don't even hope for betterment and they knew that they are only being used.. but do they have a choice? they got paid for it and they needed it.. even though they knew that the whole thing is only a false image they bite on it so that even just in a few days they could escape from hunger.

Rallies and riots for no reason, same thing they are paid just to stain a name.

So whom should we vote?

I think there are only 3 candidates who are credible enough to grab the slot of next President. Manny Villar, Noynoy Aquino and Gibo Teodoro.

According to the current constitution (1987), the President must be at least 40 years of age, a Filipino citizen by birth, and is a resident of the Philippines for the past 10 years prior to election.The president heads the Executive branch of the government, which includes the Cabinet and all executive departments. The executive power, as such, is vested on the President alone.The president is also the Commander-in-Chief of the Armed Forces of the Philippines.(http://en.allexperts.com/e/p/pr/president_of_the_philippines.htm)

The choice that the people will make is very crucial, the choice of the next leader is in Filipino's hands.

On the issue of expertise.

The nationalist party had claim that their bet has the most experience . I say yes , clearly, Ninoy and Gibo aren't experts in stealing the money of people.

Apparently, I don't like Manny Villar to be the next president, I am torn on Gibo and Noynoy. But these few days, Ia m quite disappointed on Noynoy's campaign, his group is also throwing spoiled bread.

Vilar on the other hand is a business expert, I could say he could make an improvement on our economy. He has been a senate president and in terms of political status, I bet Villar is on the 1st rank. But do we trust this man? Filipinos are skeptical these days. people is pondering on how can villar take back the billions he had spent for his campaign? and we have the negative answer, probably he would get it back in his years as a president. And that is our major fear. Villar had many controversies, the C5 extension.and the alleged alliance of the current administration....I can say that yes he is the secret partner of PGMA because all of a sudden the people from the administration are now on his track....and honestly I think a businessman like him, who has many properties wold only conflict as his position as a president. And also I hate it because why do the hell he used billions just for a campaign>?? he is really hungry.....and I hate it when I turn on TV I saw his stupid jingle and all those poor kids......Poverty is not only the problem in this country.hahaha....Could he actually clear out poverty>??? For me He is a man of stupid lies.....

Well I do admire him for his diligence but I don't think he is trustworthy.......

Good governance is not inherited.I mean there's no absolute truth that Noynoy will do a good governance just because his parents were. Although I still have trust on him, I mean for sure he is protecting the legacy of his parents.Noynoy haven't really authored-or coauthored a law that I could say made a big good change. And his years on the senate, I don't hear much of him in trials and honestly i don't think he made a huge impact.Noy noy was not full hearted on his decision to run as the next president. My worry on me, maybe his future advisers or colleagues could tricked him and signed a wrong paper....I think he is easily persuaded and I'm afraid of that. For me I want the next president who has the courage and can make his own decisions. I say Noynoy is a man of principles but I don't think he is a lion as he's father and as a fighter as his mother.

Click on these sites and have a review on Villar and Noynoy's records on the Philippine politics

http://www.mahalo.com/noynoy-aquino

http://www.scribd.com/doc/26259413/Senator-Manny-Villar-s-Legislative-Record

I am for Gibo.....Because I think he is the most humble and fair competitor among the candidates. He is the 2nd riches presidential and yet he didn't spent millions for his campaign.His party Lakas-Kampi-CMD sponsors the expense in his campaign..Among the three he is also the least of airshows of his commercial.He didn't pay for any celebrity to endorse him, those celebritiies proudly voluntary supports him. And these past days his many people proclaimed their full support on Gbo.He is the youngest secretary to hold the national defense position.He has the intelligence and ability.Even though some of his pawns betrayed him , he was able to manage to stand on his flag. We never heard anything from Gibo saying bad against a candidate nor about any party. Gibo was doing all his best in a clean way.

I do agree on the negative implementation of surveys. i mean Surveys should not been shown or be bases on who to be voted. It actually manipulate people whom to vote. Surveys are not that validated and it really gave an unfair connotation on some candidates. Surveys seem to be right because most of the people are relying on it. I said a month ago, we should vote for Gibo, but a friend of mine insisted that if we vote for Gibo it will only be wasted because for sure he won't win. And what is the basis of my friend for telling this?? the surveys........there's no problem in surveys it's just that I don't think it shouldn't be publicly announced,it confuses the mind of Filipinos.

People's machine...I'm afraid if there will be no automated election next week. I mean if we go back to manual counting, there's a higher risk of cheating.With that there could be another Garci connivance.

Honestly, I am also not that confident in the people's machine there are lot of ways that it could be manipulated.

Honestly I don't have trust on the COMELEC. The government should investigate these anomalies inside the Comelec.

I am frustrated because Philippines spent billions for this automated election, and I really don't know what will happen if they finally announced on going back to manual election. Here we go again, we can't deny it our ningas-kugon attitude. The comelec was very proud of it and showed great improvement months after It was announced that there will be an automated election.But what now?? until now the problems aren't fixed....until now the machines aren't yet ready.

Are we really ready for an automated election.I hope so.....I am afraid that all these delays and dilemmas are only shows so that a black shadow could have longer time thinking of the next strategy to steal the vote of the people......Smartmatic..could you please be more responsible?? I mean the Philippines had rusted your company and yet we think you aren't doing your best.......why oh why?

Whatever are the problems and issues .....I think it is best of us to pray, that there will be a clean and safe election next week.....and that the plans will run smoothly and people will be hopeful and calm.What we can do now.....is stop the pressure.hahaha.for sure those people are on heatwave.let's just give them a chance.....and wait and see..........Hopefully everything works........Let it all be done in the hands of God......

I don't have the right to make a claim nor to protest because I am not a registered voter..But I have the right to speak up my mind and be concern in the events of election.Yes you may say, how can I be concerned when in the first place I didn't take time to be registered.......it is one thing I regret.,...for not doing my part.yes before I really have the intention to not to vote because I thought no one deserves my vote......but the bottom line is , we citizens we should also be active and participate.no matter what It is .at least you Vote!! at least you have spoken...and with that you have the

There's hope for this country.it's gonna be a new day........

 . . We should not depend on one man, we should depend on all of us. All of us is expandable in the cause for freedom and therefore I say stand up now and be a leader, and when all of us are leaders, we will expedite the cause of freedom”Ninoy Aquino quotes, number 7 – “. . . I believe that we Filipinos could not fight for our freedom, we do not deserve it, we should not depend on the Americans, we should depend on ourselves . . . “Ninoy aquino"

Stop blaming, and Do your PART!Be a Leader ..........

The month of April is really getting much hotter here in the Philippines, sometimes I would just imagine I'm in another country enjoying the breeze of wind and the blow of snow. To have a little serenity this one desert like day, I went to my cousin's house, well originally I was supposed to company her in the university where I am currently studying to take an entrance test. The appointment was cancelled and so she suggested me to watch the Japanese TV drama one litre of tear.My friend before has told me about a story of a teenage girl who suffered in an incurable disease. My friend was talking about the Japanese TV adaptation of Aya Kito's diary. One litre of tears, by the title alone it was clear-cut that the show is a heavy drama, and the title alone made us glimpse of emotions in the story.

"To be able to smile and tell everyone this; i have, at least, cried one litre of tears. "

Aya Kitō was a Japanese girl who wrote a diary about her experience with spinocerebellar degeneration disease. Her life story is very inspiring. She was very brave to fight her disease. Aya's character was like a glowing light in a dark arena. She was full of hope .

It was truly heart-rending, the day her parents knew about her disease and it was more remorseless when Aya herself have known her disease. It is truly mortifying to know taht one day you wouldn't be able to walk, eat, talk and wake up...

Why did the disease choose me? I cannot carry it, if it's just for the word "fate".

With these words coming out from her polite lips, crystal tears fell from her eyes. It is truly hard for someone to accept the gruesome truth. As I watched these scene I imagined those people who also have incurable disease and to those people who were just victims and suffer from pain.

I would confess that sometimes I think God is unfair, life is unfair..I thought that there are just things that people don't deserve, I though sometimes why is it that those good people often suffer while others who just don't care and do evil things didn't even have an inch of despair.

Yes, even though I don't have a disease I have questioned, why this kind of life have chosen me?

Purpose driven Life is a book I have read when I was in high school. In that book I have understood life,it's trial's,test, and its temporary assignments. Everything happens for a purpose. Some say if God doesn't do any harm to people then why such accidents and tragedies happen? I say that it is the people who are unfair,it is the people who are shaping its own harm. There are things that we don't understand why it exist, there are situations that sometimes we don't understand why it occurred but one thing is for sure, everything happens for a good reason.

"As I think about the past,the tears will come out.Reality is too cruel, too brutal.I don't even have the right to dream.As I think about the future,the tears will come out again."

I cried and cried for every episode of this TV drama, I felt pity for Aya, she was so good, she was a basketball player in her school and has many plans in the future but the disease took away all her imaginations of the good future.

Some people just took granted of what they have, the family,their potentials and their body, not even thinking that thee are many hopeful dreamers who wished for what they have. In aya's story I have learned to value what I have. Unlike Aya, I can say I didn't have a good memory of the past but I always have a big picture of the future. Every time I reminisce of the past it let my heart tormented.Yes reality is too cruel and brutal and humans are selfish. I think that is why fairy tales and happy endings were written to let people forget the pain and wounds brought by reality, to at least for a little time drift in a world of happiness and gave everyone a chance to continue dreaming.

"I'm glad I came (to Higashi High School again),because it reminded me,the 15-year old me,

was indeed, alive here."

Aya kept on writing her diary even it was physically painful to make it as an evidence that she is alive.

It was heart wrenching to know that a 15 year old was once a blossoming rose but as the sun sets it turned pale. Even though she was only 15, it didn't stop her from living. What really inspires me on Aya is her courage, her courage to wake up everyday and smile top people even though she is carrying a sad letter.She was always alive

"The flower petals are opening up,each one more than the other.The flowers will once again blossom in full glory.Knowing yesterday what will happen to them today,made me happy.""Just that one sentence, 'I won't leave you',encouraged me a lot.Doctor, thank you for not leaving me."

I think everybody needs encouragement. What is wonderful about Aya, she influenced people and encouraged them. When we re down and in deep trials we always hope because there are people who can we count on. yes even just a smile or a single word it will light up the world. Everybody needs someone , because we can't live alone, because we need reflections and a rod that will keep us look straight.

Sometimes people would even create a lie just to take away the pain and keep the light .The whole point is, we care for each other that's why we don't leave someone behind. Isn't it great when we knew those people around us won't leave us . It is one trait of humans we should always nourish and share , standing by our family, friends, partners or even strangers.

I want to build a time machine and revisit the past. If it weren't for this disease, I might even be in love. I want to cling to someone's arm so badly.

This line let my tears overflow again. Everybody is chasing for love and in Aya's situation she seems to think of it as only a dream. I admire Asou , her friend and classmate who turned to be her love interest.

In this world Humans are only actually searching for love, they may do good and evil but in the end of the day they kept on thinking of Love.

There are just times that you want something badly and you are waiting for it patiently but as the rain comes and the sun shines it seems to be not coming. And for sure we knew what it felt like and I think that feeling, Aya felt it too.

* Even though I have been hurt before by those heartless glares this also helped me to understand that around me, there still exists some gentle glares. Therefore, I definitely won't run away. That's what I'll do. Definitely. Always.

I have experienced that sometimes , there are some just glances that seems to be saying they are disgusted and I it felt so bad. When people see something unusual they would look straight to it, stare to it so deeply. But sometimes people don't know that these glance are hurtful. Yes it is true there are some glances that are kind and we knew from the heart that they want to help us .Aya was so strong to keep on smiling to them and just ignore their eye's judgements. It was grateful that Aya was smart and understanding.

* People shouldn't dwell on the past. It's enough to try your best in all that you're doing now.

Yes this is absolutely true, we shouldn't prison ourselves in the past. Yes there memories of the past that could haunt us but we should let those experiences be a teacher on us. There are also memories in the past that are worth remembering and we should let it remind us of happiness. Past already existed, it is already written and we can't do anything from it but today and tomorrow we could do the right thing. Today and tomorrow make the best out of it because sooner it will be a memory and isn't that great to always remember good things? We need to keep moving forward.

* Where should I head towards? Even if there isn't answer, I'll feel better by writing it down. I've looked for a pair of helping hands but I couldn't feel them, couldn't see them. I only face towards darkness and hear hear the sounds of my hopeless screams.

Writing was the only ability that keep Aya living. And no matter how hard it was for her she used all her strength to write down what she felt and thought.

"Just being alive is such a lovely and wonderful thing."

* If you look up at the sky after falling down the blue sky is also today stretching limitlessly and smiles at me...I'm alive.

I think this is a line that most people forgot to recognize. To breath everyday is indeed a wonderful thing.To enjoy God's creations is a wonderful gift.

It is sad to know that there are people who don't value life, after watching aya's story it made me realize how blessed I am. I am blessed because at 15 I was able to do things that I can. I am blessed because i have my legs, my arms, I could walk, run, write and post a blog. I am blessed because like Aya I have my family and friends. I am blessed because like aya , God is with me.

It is also sad when I see people doing all those vices that could damage their health, yes they enjoyed it for a night or a day or a week , a month and more years but it will bring darkness to them in a lifetime. I just couldn't understand why people abuse what they have. I mean we could enjoy the pleasures but there's no need to over do it. Are we that selfish? we can't get contented of enough? but is enough , enough for them? It is so sad that they couldn't think that when they got those disease it is their loved one who will suffer more. It is so sad that they couldn't appreciate time. Aya was afraid of time , because she knew anytime something is gonna happen. Why is it then , there is Aya who loses her dreams yet continue to strive and why is then other people who has everything and yet keep on throwing them. Life is beautiful and the sand grain is turning to ashes. What a wonderful world we have. Let's enjoy it , we have a lot of time to do good things. Life is yours don't waste it.

Urgent....Alarming....Save the Dolphins

This is the sad news that I've seen on a note in Facebook......this is so unbelievable

I GOT THIS FROM A MAIL. I WAS DEVASTATED. :'((

The sea is stained in red and its not because of global warming.

It's because of the cruelty that the human beings to the smart Calderon Dolphins.

This happens every year in Faroe Island in Denmark. In this slaughter, the main participants are young teens. To show that they are adults and they are already mature.

In this big celebration, nothing is missing for the fun. Everyone is participating in one way or the other, killing or looking at the cruelty “supporting like a spectator”

Is it necessary to mention that the Calderon Dolphins, like all the other species of dolphins, in it’s near extinction. They get near men to play and interact. In a way of pure friendship.

They don’t die instantly; they are cut 2 to 3 times with thick hocks. At that time the dolphins produce a sound extremely attuned to the cry of a new born child.

The Dolphins dies slowly soaked in its own blood

We will send this mail until this email arrives in any association defending the animals.

PLEASE HELP ME STOP THIS TERRIFYING AND NONSENSE CRUELTY!!! PLEASE REBLOG.

- FRANZ HILARIO

 
This is really terrifying.......there should be an immediate action for this