A girl before the mirror I

I have always loved Art. I don’t have my own masterpiece but I call my self an artist. I can say I am artistic in a sense that I've got a unique way of thinking and expressing my ideas.

Who doesn't love art? What’s in art that it shouldn’t be love? Art is irresistible

Some say art is indefinable...art is mutable, some say art is inclusive some say it is merely an ambulant idea Art is beauty, an enshrouded memory, a bear witness, a manifestation, expression ,imagination, reality.. Above all art is a wonderful creation

I just wish that I have the natural skills and talents for Art. I adore paintings and have always took a long time in decoding its hidden interpretation...I must say maybe I have fallen for mystery...For me art is a mystery but it doesn’t need discovery cause it freely divulges its own identity, it just need an open mind to brood over .

It’s my pleasure to reckon at depictions, colors and kaleidoscopes always make my mood. But I must be honest I've got no hands for art but I have my heart for Arts. 

It could be probably true that there is no one ugly, no one unskilled, no one is dumb, and no one isn't good it is just many are lazy. Well, I've known some friends who have incredibly created art because they had dedicated their time in enhancing and keening their knowledge and potential of art. Well if it happened to then, maybe the gift of art will arrive soon in my temple. Hahahhhahha...truly I just got frustrated every time I'm trying to do some art piece. But yes I am still an artist...hahhaha

Looking at arts, inspires me...it justifies my existence, some are only shades, some of different strokes, some are formed by combinations. And some puzzles. Abstract is the type of Art I praised most. Well among all art, this is the genre in which I could at least excel... kekekekek...I do abstract works because it is the easiest type of art I could do...I mean as a person also I would just like to freely draw what I want , I don't like much details and I want to confuse my audience.hahhaha...Not really confuse but I want to keep them thinking, I want to make them curious...Abstract for me is just like carefree, you could put whatever you want, disorganize it and wallah you have some beauty out of it. 

My favorite painters are michelangelo, juan Luna, davinci and of course Pablo Picasso.....the first time I've heard of the name Picasso it immediately made me think of a harlequin...Picasso it is a colorful name indeed. In some of my poems that I have written I had mentioned Picasso, well I knew only a little about his life but I found him to be profound, romantic and liberal.

Well so Pablo Picasso is a Spanish painter who spent his adult life in France and yes he was sort of a rebel in his teen age life. Picasso was married twice and had four children by three women.He actually had a complicated love story. He had a scandalous affair with Francoise Gilot who is the mother of his 2 children...

And most of them became the subjects of Picasso's paintings. Well Picasso's life was much like of a circus and I always wondered what kind of lover painters would be. Since he is a painter could he be more sentimental? Could he be more romantic? Or much more of a playboy a liar? A man who can't be contented on one dish? Well painters paint their own love story. 

Picasso's vocations are very inimitable, in some of his works he made no vivid representations but he let the spectators explore his work, he made them curious. Painters are similar with writers they want to feed the mind, soul and heart. Some may used it to revolt; some used it to declare the truth Picasso once said that Art is a lie that makes us realize truth. Up until now, I’m still thinking about this quote, but yes lies do makes us realize the truth same thing with death made us appreciate life . Yes art maybe a figment of imagination maybe a realm of utopia but every piece of it has a bite of reality. Art maybe false but once it bloomed the truth sets it free.

A girl before a mirror II

 Well one of my favorite of Picasso's work is the Girl before a mirror. There were many conjectures and elucidations have been made regarding this piece... In one of my readings it was mentioned that the girl before a mirror is Marie-Therese Walter the 1st mistress of Picasso. As we could see in the painting the woman seems to be pregnant, many critics have said that Picasso's paintings entails sexuality. Well if it was truly Walter then perhaps the woman in the mirror could be in a contemplating mode. Could it be a manifestation of a woman full of regrets the woman outside the mirror seems to be in state of happiness at the same in state of confusion and as the woman reflects on herself she could see a woman weeping? Because the woman inside the mirror seems to be sadder, the colors are deeper and darker. The woman could have faced reality and reality she sees is painful. Or could it be the wife and the other woman. Outside the mirror is the other woman (Marie Walter) and inside is the wife (Olga Khoklova). Picasso may have compared his life with two different women whom he had both children with. Was he more happy with Marie > was his life was gloomy with Olga? Well anyways many questions have been raise regarding this painting. 

As what I see in the painting, the painting is implying self-awareness. The painting could define the conflict between the real self and the ideal self. This could be a person unsure of her and was afraid to accept her true self. The girl before the mirror seems to be comforting the girl inside the mirror. Is it trying to steal away or is it embracing? Is it someone being trapped and wants to break free? Is it someone who pretends to be happy but inside is tearing apart? Is it someone forms the past and present? Someone who had hope and who is broken hearted?

While looking at the painting I could associate with Disney's mulan. I the title could change to Mulan in the mirror.kekeke....Yes the song reflection by Christina Aguilera assemble the painting. 

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Somehow I cannot hide
Who I am, Though I've tried
When will my
Reflection show who I am inside?
When will my reflection show?

I don't know for some of you, but most of the time I sung this song. Well yes, in front of some people I just can't act the way I want to be and I envy those people who are bold and frank, unafraid and very confident. Sometimes I imagine myself as a celebrity, like lady gaga or big bang ha-ha who can wear the fashion they want, tell the world what they feel and think. Doing it on the unconventional way. Well but I guess I can't live that way and it lead me to thinking that being in the public's eye would make worst because you'll be living according to their judgments. We can't resist that their voices and outraged do really affect us. Well I guess there is no absolute freedom we'll be living in accordance to the norm and the system. No matter how we fight for rights and for liberalism there will always be a limit. And I guess that’s fair enough, it would be selfish if we would want to impose everything what we want....keeping the norms would mean discipline and harmony...well but norms do change every time..We can't just always live the way we wanted it to be.

Keeping on...What's with the mirror... does the mirror symbolize the boundary, boundary of reality and idealism? A representation of difference? Difference in status? Difference among elegance and simplicity among the powerful and the pauppers? Is it someone in great authority trying to capture the weeping innocent who is trapped in the box of society? Could girl before a mirror a social issue, well I must say we could put a thousand words on that painting but the interpretation depends on how we see the painting. The creator may hold the original story but the viewers are always free to create their own versions and to recreate art. Yes beauty is in the eye of the beholder, same thing with Art its definition lies on the enthusiast.

Well I must say Picasso truly made us curious after all….Life is full of billions of unresolved mysteries, life is full of gazillion questions and Life is always curios..

why?

it's endless...futile...no it's the beginning...it’s inane…it's ending is uncertain....

could you really say something about love without knowing it? could you really write something about love without feeling it??? Could you really dance about love when you don't see it??....could you really share something about love without experiencing it???

Could a person who has gone through with love can see the difference?? can they know if its all pretensions or it is the truth?.......can they create miracles ? can they make better decisions? can they make better crafts? Can they know more about Love? Can they have lesser questions?

What is so great about this love? that almost everyone is dying for it.......what is it with love that we even change who we are and forget what we want........what is it in love that it makes people do some things without thinking?What's in love that it suddenly gives hope, that it change the frowns into clowns, that it turned silver into gold..

what's in love that it makes people heart beat faster...what is it in love that when it is betrayed it just hurts to death....What is it in love that everyone is speaking about it, thinking about it and seeking for it.......

Who created Love?? Why it had existed??? Why is it?? why is it so desirable, so pleasurable, so good, why does it makes us happy why does it makes us feel that we are complete that we are worth it ,, what's in love that it suddenly turned us into warriors, suddenly turned us into heroes., suddenly turned as some one's protector..??

what is it love that it made our heart bleeding ...that it made us to think the worst in our selves....That it made us hate...what is it in love that make us cry in the middle of the night that made us act as if we don't care....that suddenly turned us into revengeful...that turned us to want some more and unsatisfied??What's in love that made us jealous, that suddenly wipes our dreams that suddenly gave us misery...Why Love suddenly fades, Why love remains?

How does love waits? How does love fills the space? How does love cracks the space? How does it linger?

Love who created you?? Why do you cause happiness and grief........

Love why do you come and go?

Love why do you break those promises

Love why do make people crazy?

Love why you are unbearable?

Love why you are intangible?

Love are you a myth , are you a history or a prophecy?

Love why you created ecstasy?

Love why did you built fantasy

Love why you are so unpredictable?

 Love why made me not sleep night

Love why did you make someone pop up in my mind?

Love why you gave me this feeling?

• Why is it seems that everyone is trembling over the coming of the world’s end?
  What are we afraid for? are we afraid to die? or are we afraid to face the day of judgment?..
  I mean in the end, we are all gonna perish and we gonna lose the material things..I am not afraid to die, because I know if that day comes I will be living with GOD..
  
  

• natural calamities are beyond our control, but what matters most is how we respond to those tragedies…It seems a happy picture after all, knowing that other people care for each other, knowing that strangers pray for each other , and seeing the different races and nations helping each other.. It’s a perfect view to see LOVE in times of catastrophe…
  I know JAPAN will rise after the fall, for they have made it before..Let’s pray for the healing of their country and continue to manifest LOVE.God bless us all…

The lonely hearts club

It's a new year and next week will be a new month. Next month is like every one's else favorite aside from Christmas and new year I guess . Next month is the 28 days of Love ..oh yeah Love, the perfect word for every creature.

I feel strange the past few weeks I got into something obsession,,, obsession of thinking someone and obsession of feeling light....I don't know what drama is in store for me but I hope cupid won't struck that arrow any time soon....I know some of you out there are blissfully in love some may just have just sang a heartache and some are daydreaming for their perfect match... Love ...Love...Love...

There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can sing that can't be sung.
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game
It's easy.
There's nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that can't be saved.
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you
in time - It's easy.

Certainly just like the Beatles song All we need is love. No matter what your definition of Love , we all aim for it.

Because Valentines day is just an inch away I decide to write a review about the book I just had finish reading "The lonely Hearts club"....Well just by reading the title I am certain it is a teen age love and I am certain it is something  I could relate into.

So let me start now...The story revolves around Penny lane apparently from her name no wonder her parents and she is an avid of the Beatles..well the book is almost much about the Beatles ..My father is also a fan of Beatles especially with Lenon and like Penny I grew up hearing their songs and stories. Beatles is truly one of the greatest and controversial artists of all time.

Penny had this childhood friend named Nate which eventually became his boyfriend turned out to be cheating on her and from that day on she decided to never date boys after high school....

I know some would think that is such a silly idea , i could remember in high school I was also making that kind of deal of not having a boyfriend until 18 and it turned out that deal has extended the age limit....(hahahah)

Penny's best friend is Tracy who has no boyfriend since birth . From the very start Tracy was against this conventional idea of  Penny . Tracy had her own list of boys and always made her way to date the names on her list but sad too say Tracy didn't get her wish list. 

I am like Tracy except for the boy lists thing , the one who truly supports her friend and always play the devil's advocate, I mean the one who thinks most differently or contradictory to the usual.....

Soon after there this girl named Diane who was actually the original best friend of Penny. Diane turned away from penny after she got into relationship with Ryan ( the most desirable man in their campus)......So when Diane and Ryan parted ways but remained friends , Diane went back to Penny. 

I know a lot of girl would relate into this......I've witnessed this.... there are some girls who thought that the world only revolves around him and her . I think that really sucks , leaving a best friend for a guy and then when it all goes wrong you ran again towards your best friend......It is like a friend of utensil......a friend when only needed.....But no matter what our friends are still our friends and because of that we forgive them and accept them as if nothing happened..

And that is exactly what happened to penny and Diane...It started rough with Diane and Tracy but became close friends later on ....Now the lonely hearts club is getting bigger as Diane and Tracy have joined in and numerous girls have eventually joined in... It started form 3, to 5 then to 30 and so on.They have one clear rule and that is no dating of boys until after high school ...But penny seem to have trouble with it especially she started to realize she likes Ryan the ex of Diane...The group had caught the attention of their principal and even asked penny to stop it and most especially it hurt the ego of the McKinley boys for almost of the girls wouldn't date them and blamed the lonely heart of penny.. But the club just grew stronger and it was really empowering, it had helped some of the members to take care of their selves......No to cut this short......

In the end the club had decided to change the rules and allowed the members to date as long as they attended all group meetings and doesn't leave their friend...the ending was penny and Ryan kissed under the mistletoe.

Now , I am actually disappointed with the ending, the book was too short I wanted more... i though there would be more conflict but it just ended so smoothly........In the first few readings it would really lead you to some amusement or maybe I was just expecting too much. Anyways, For you out there it is really unfair to think of all mean as all jerks, I've also thought of it before but you really need to believe that not all men are the same.. there is no one hue nor one sound...

Penny may have thought of it but that was because she just came from a rough ending of  her fairytale relationship...For all you out there with lonely hearts always remember you are not alone, look at your friends . Friends gave you the love that you always needed so never throw them aways always treasure them. What I liked most of the book is the Female power. Imagine an all female club has made the boys gone really mad. I think this also goes for all the girls to be always careful to always not forget who you are. As stated in the book when girl are in a relationship they tend to act , pretended to be someone just to please their boyfriends . Well , isn't it more nice that our special someone love us for who we are not because we portray what they want us to be. I've known girls and woman who have sacrificed things just to keep the relationship , well I guess everybody wants to keep a relationship but sometimes sacrificing is not always the solution. I'm sorry to tell this but why should there be a martyr?/? At least leave a little piece of dignity ...Never forget yourself because you are valuable.. There's nothing wrong with loving but it comes wrong when you are hurting your own self.

Always love yourself first, for how can you possibly love when your not filled with it, there's nothing to give if you don't have it...

To be in love and to be loved is the perfect feeling . For all of you who are man haters ,and there's  bunch of hood guys not just jerks...Do not be unfair...There's nothing to be afraid of when it comes to love because it should be unconditional... Why think of all those fears when it doesn't make you feel better.....

I'm not the relationship expert but you must value of whatever relationship you have now...Life is a package there's no reason to feel lonely and cursed the boys.......why don't take the risk , isn't it much better than standing still and doing nothing? they say love waits but I say time waits for no one.....

Its always spinning and everything changes......We all search for love but love will never find our way if we are stuck in the same box........Enjoy your date with your valentine....And for all the ladies whoa re single like me , let's all have a toast and enjoy the season of Love..

I am going to leave you with the most wonderful definition of Love from Corinthians

 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant,  does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,  does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth;  bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away.  For we know in part and we prophesy in part;  but when the perfect comes, the partial will be done away. When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things.  For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known.  But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love.

melody

I am still waiting for the day,,,,,for the day of new land ,,,,

Day and night I keep on shading the lamp
before closing the eyes I took a leap of faith
I am in this place, a place where I was molded
I am in this place, a place of my first memory
I am in this place, a place of black and gray

I don't want to be prison here...I've been wishing..praying.to be somewhere out..but there's no way to escape..My heart is crushed..I go deeper on the wells...trying the best luck but still i wait for no tomorrow...


Man and woman destined to be together....bells and rings celebrates happiness.....moon and starts shines at night......Man and woman loved each other....


***lady of symphony

Why Do I not Love?
Why do I not love? he asked me
Why do I not love? I asked me
love is cruel, yet is the sweetest pain
love is fragile yet it is the most unbreakable.
Now, why do I not love?
Do I not love because I hate?
Do I not love because I'm afraid?
or Do I not love because I know you won't love me back.


***Lady of symphony in seasons of love

Will I wait in vain or stand coldly in the pouring rain
Will you be on my side to give me warm
Will the whisper of winter fade away
or will the sun bursts and turn our love into dusts
I don't know..with uncertainties I cannot give love
call me weak and hate me to death but I can't give a love
for I have not known love for I never met love
I don't know when will the spring of love come or will it ever greet me again
Under this maple tree , I will be like the alluring leaves waiting for the spring
And when it comes, just like the leaves I will gracefully fall and dance in the wind

Hymn for HIM

You were the stranger I never bothered to know

 The wall I would just pass by

The paper that give me no impression

The shadow that never caught my eye

The star I never gazed up on night

But destiny has throned the dice and we landed on the same field

Then You were seating next to me. 

At the end, at the back row of  the arena, we were there.

And each of our black moon has locked on its path.

A smile on your grimace and a kindle in my own trace.

Now you speak up and I've heard your voice,

Addictive as wine, the only music I could define

We were there at the back row, at the end of the plaza.

And every day we got closer with each other.

We opened our diaries and we spoke the letters

And we didn't mind the Picasso.

We were there , at the back row at the end of the sweet garden

I felt your lavish skin and now we were never in a distance

And now we see each others world

We were there at the back row at the end of Adam's paradise.

We prayed that the music won't stop, 

But we could never control the symphony

The curtains have closed and the orchestra has died

We were there at the back row at the end of the Great Opera House

Two hearts have become one in the center of circles

The Top and the Ball have danced for the night

We were there at the back row at the end of the city of Love

But now they were just  sweet memories written at the end, at the back row of the buried History 

The Elizabeth had once asked 

will thou dae everything?

Will thee be undone for Love?

Will thou stop the rolls and halt the knights?

What can thee dae for LOVE?

Another dice was thrown

But we were no longer there

      We are no longer at the back row at the end of the castle

And just like any other tragic story

We ended up like Romeo and Juliet

For I chose to let go

For I can't do anything For Love

For I am not Islde

Forgive me for leaving you at the back row at the end of  the temple

Fare thee well